I've Loved You Forever

When I was seven and rocked my dolly
I begged and prayed to become your mommy
If God would just bring that doll to life
I'd be your mom, and I'd be His wife
I was sure we were ready to be together
I'm your mom and I've loved you forever

Notes passed on a school day
Saved in dresser drawers
Playbills saved from school plays
love notes and dried flowers

I saved them and I wondered
what it is you'd say
My teenage self would ponder
if you'd share those parts of me one day

I struggled with anger, frustration and pride
I'd run and I'd bottle my pain up inside
I ached with the battle to grow up and be strong
I had the hardest time learning it's okay to be wrong
I dreamed of your birth; hoped you'd handle things better
I'm still your mom and I've loved you forever

I grew strong and travelled
I saw many things
As my life unravelled
I tried out my wings
I fought hard to see you
to know me through your eyes
I prayed for you daily
that God make you wise
I knew way back then you'd belong to me never
but, I'm still your mom and I've loved you forever

Then my body held you in dark and safe keeping
You gave me no peace waking or sleeping
Even inside me you fought to be known
Strangers would marvel at the struggle you shown

You entered life wailing with anger and triumph
an infantile warrior sounding the cry of...
My body near failing your voice kept me here
for hours you railed, your cries calmed my fear
We learned how to fight, for our beginning, together
I am your mom and I've loved you forever.

You're growing up strong now
and finding your way
Throughout your life you've always known how
As independent as you were that very first day


You walked as a baby
Read on your own
And now a young lady
You fight to stand alone
I cannot agree and I doubt I will ever
but I am your mom and I've loved you forever.

People will hurt you
The "takers"  won't stay
Lovers desert you
Fight as you may

There are only a few
family sure matters
when the thrill isn't new
and all your dreams scatter
Those who have known you help you to bring it together
We've loved through it all
We've loved you forever.

When you're upset
And when you run
when you forget
who you're called to become
I am here waiting, I'll turn away never
I am your mom and I've loved you forever


We can't escape it
No one can take it
even rage, jealousy
can't halt or remake it
Bright sunny skies and dark, stormy weather
I'll still be your mom and I've loved you forever.


JM 2018

May our sons flourish in their youth
    like well-nurtured plants.
May our daughters be like graceful pillars,
    carved to beautify a palace. - Psalm 144:12





























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