RISK
I've been very busy. Mostly, busy with; love, dreams, children, adventure and business...pretty much in that order. You see, I've realized a few things. One, is that He crafted each of our destinies before our birth. Our ENTIRE lives here on this planet are spent either fulfilling that destiny or watching him shove chance after chance ,after miracle after obvious miracle, in our faces to get us to recognize what we were made for. What I was made for is not what you were made for but inside of you, you KNOW what you were made for. You may spend your life trying to put things in that hole but the square pegs will never fit where what was round was made to go. He keeps doing it. We are afraid, we are doubtful. We think we are wise and we are foolish. Still, He reminds us over and over.
Another point I've realized is that I was made for risk. There's all this talk of "faith" in the Bible. It's in the Old Testament and it's in the New. I'm not sure I ever really "got it" 'til now. Faith is not looking back, not wondering, not waiting for a better time or another place. Faith is not deciding I have limitations or that what I really want to accomplish for Him is too hard or too "Silly". Faith is taking that thing inside of you that you know to do and fighting for it...working towards it every day and never quitting, even when they tell you you're crazy or too busy or too obligated to everyone else.
I've been told my whole life that I'm crazy. There have been health professionals hired to prove I am certifiably crazy and they have only been able to confirm the opposite, that my faith sustains me and I am actually highly intelligent (that's a true story!) for the glory of God. The Bible says that Abraham's faith was "Credited to him as righteousness." My favorite definition of righteousness is one I heard a pastor say years and years ago: "Righteousness is right-standing with God." Isn't that what we all want? To stand before God, here and now in this life and know there is nothing in us to be ashamed of...to not try and cover up anything or ask Him to ignore the dark places in our hearts? To be clean and lit up and shiny in His eyes? I dare say that even the worst of the pagans (there's no such thing in God's eyes, only ours) would love to stand before God, like that. Yes, faith is risk and I have never liked risk but I've realized on this journey that I have nothing to lose. Everything I have belongs to Him. It was all a miracle to this point, and if I end up with nothing at the end, He will still be faithful because He also said: "He is a rewarder of those who earnestly seek Him". What better way to seek God than to defy all the odds, embrace risk and seek out what He made me for?
As a side note, Have you ever noticed that in most male/female relationships it is the man who wants to take all the risk and the woman who is always trying to "Drag him back from the brink" and get him to consider some real possibilities before he throws caution to the wind? Ever notice that? THAT, dear friend, is because MAN (not woman) is created in the image of God and faith, otherwise known as risk is engrained in his divine and eternal spirit. He, in fact, has "God seed" in him and no matter how the devil tries to corrupt the "image of God (man)" on this earth he cannot touch man's spirit...a spirit that matches the very nature of God. Please realize that risk without the desire to please God is definitely dangerous as you "risk" pleasing the ruler of this world and that's bound to end badly, eventually. It doesn't stop man from acting in faith though...it's the way he was made. Women can learn a lot from men. I just wish we'd get over that curse (the controlling one) that set us back in the garden and made us want to dominate men. It really screws with our ability. I hate the devil, that snake.
I know, I know....I too am tired of "pastor's" (in quotes to include all the different labels they like to paste on themselves these days) telling us who we should be and to "embrace what we know" and "follow Jesus" and using all that vague "spiritual" talk that we are supposed to just understand and if we don't it's because we don't quite love Jesus like we should and then we're back where we started. I'm tired of that. I've heard it my whole life and really, what I've learned about a relationship with Christ is that I find out what to do and where to go by listening to what's inside of me...no one else, just the eternal spirit in me. Some of us take longer than others to quiet the noise around us and to stop caring what other people have to say about us. Some of us are so good at being whoever society tells us to be that we have no idea who we are. You see, when you realize who you are, whether you know Jesus or not, you've heard from HIM. God doesn't just chase the people who know Him...who claim intimate relationship with Him. He is after ALL of us and He flashes our purpose in our lives, in our hearts, in the world around us most every day. He speaks to ALL of us because He WANTS all of us. That's how Love is. You don't have to do anything to find out who you are but pay attention. When you do? When you stop listening to everyone and everything else (it's taken me so long) and you hear what it is you were made for? Run for it....no matter the cost, no matter the sacrifice, no matter the hardship. The dichotomy here is that if the spirit inside of you is not of God it will not define a way to your purpose...instead of seeing direction, you will have to search for it...you will have to listen harder, fail often and keep shoving square pegs in round holes but don't quit. Then?
Here's the danger; If you seek out your purpose and God is not already directing your steps? I mean, if you've never had a salvation experience? If you have not committed your heart and mind and spirit to the being who made it in the first place? You're bound to run smack dab into Him. When you identify who you are? You've identified Christ Himself. You, my friend, are made in the image of God. You have been lied to...we all have but if you seek the Truth you'll find it. Do I still seem to be talking in riddles? Let me give you an example. This blog is about plans and if you've followed my writings to any extent you know that this blog account began with a dream. That dream has, at times, seemed lost or interspersed with struggle and emotion. Here , my friends, if you're paying attention is the miracle of purpose...specifically my purpose:
Last spring, I was online looking for properties...specifically wooded land for sale. I was looking North but I was not looking at any one state or location. At the top of my search, a bed and breakfast property came up for sale. Although it did include land, I was puzzled because there was nothing else for housing listed in my search nor had I any interest in a B&B. I believe I've stayed at one perhaps once in my life. Curiosity got me though and I clicked on the link and noted it was listed for sale several different ways...one of which only included the adjacent land. This solved the mystery and for the evening I was satisfied. The property haunted me though and I found myself going back to the link nearly every day for the week following. I ended up booking a room with the thought that at least I could satisfy the nagging pull inside of me to see what this place's story was.
I arrived at the Victorian homestead in northern Wisconsin with my nine year old son early in the spring. It was unseasonably warm for that time of year and upon our immediate arrival I was actually disappointed. So often in my life, I build up my own expectations and ideals even when I don't know why I'm doing what I'm doing. I had heard nothing and been nowhere at this point but there was something pulling at me telling me to forget the whole notion and go home. I ignored it.
As we were early for check-in, we determined to head into town and see what we could see. I was struck by the friendliness of folks and the "small-town feel". It was way early for tourist season but things were comfortable and slow-paced and everyone seemed happy to see us. Upon returning to the B&B, I was greeted by our host and her first question to me was to ask why I was there. I wasn't sure 'til she asked me and though I wasn't specific, it didn't matter. She knew and I knew why I was there and the rest has become a bit of history that will back the miracle I anticipate.
I believe I have found my new home....our new home. I believe that the self-sustaining community I dream of will happen and I believe it will be established before I leave this earth. This past year I read a book called "The Hiding Place" by Corrie Ten Boom. She did what I want to do. It is not until the end of her book, after the horrors of her story were behind her, where she established a closed community to tend to the wounded and broken...the victims of a society that had survived such atrocities the miracle was nearly drowned in the sorrow. She provided a safe place for them. Our world has not seen such atrocities since but I believe that we will and I believe that I (we) will be ready.
It is a grandiose dream. It has been since I was young and without children. It is not "silly". It is not foolish to ache after what you've been made for. I have found someone to share my dream. I have found friends to help me achieve my dream. He provides the funds nearly daily to facilitate my dream a little bit at a time. I was made for more than motherhood. I was made for more than helping the needy and loving the broken on my little half acre of land with my white house and picket fence. I was made for more than teaching scales and training harmonies and making melodies. I was made for relationship and restoration and hope and love and to show forth the miraculous glory of God who takes a WILLING vessel...one that is broken, unfit for use but still willing to ignore what the world thinks and identify that hole inside of her. That hole in me is where my purpose goes and I am acheiving it. It is not one shape...not one piece that fits...it's like a puzzle inside of me that I've been building my whole life and I keep trying to put the pieces from the other puzzles in it from time to time instead of letting Him fit them in when and as He sees fit. I know what I was made for. I'm paying attention. When I leave this world? People will now I was here and the "print" I leave will look like the glory of God. I'm determined. I get it now. I'll take the risk. "Without faith it is impossible, absolutely impossible to please God"
And it is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him.- Hebrews 11:6
If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it.- Matthew 16:25
Another point I've realized is that I was made for risk. There's all this talk of "faith" in the Bible. It's in the Old Testament and it's in the New. I'm not sure I ever really "got it" 'til now. Faith is not looking back, not wondering, not waiting for a better time or another place. Faith is not deciding I have limitations or that what I really want to accomplish for Him is too hard or too "Silly". Faith is taking that thing inside of you that you know to do and fighting for it...working towards it every day and never quitting, even when they tell you you're crazy or too busy or too obligated to everyone else.
I've been told my whole life that I'm crazy. There have been health professionals hired to prove I am certifiably crazy and they have only been able to confirm the opposite, that my faith sustains me and I am actually highly intelligent (that's a true story!) for the glory of God. The Bible says that Abraham's faith was "Credited to him as righteousness." My favorite definition of righteousness is one I heard a pastor say years and years ago: "Righteousness is right-standing with God." Isn't that what we all want? To stand before God, here and now in this life and know there is nothing in us to be ashamed of...to not try and cover up anything or ask Him to ignore the dark places in our hearts? To be clean and lit up and shiny in His eyes? I dare say that even the worst of the pagans (there's no such thing in God's eyes, only ours) would love to stand before God, like that. Yes, faith is risk and I have never liked risk but I've realized on this journey that I have nothing to lose. Everything I have belongs to Him. It was all a miracle to this point, and if I end up with nothing at the end, He will still be faithful because He also said: "He is a rewarder of those who earnestly seek Him". What better way to seek God than to defy all the odds, embrace risk and seek out what He made me for?
As a side note, Have you ever noticed that in most male/female relationships it is the man who wants to take all the risk and the woman who is always trying to "Drag him back from the brink" and get him to consider some real possibilities before he throws caution to the wind? Ever notice that? THAT, dear friend, is because MAN (not woman) is created in the image of God and faith, otherwise known as risk is engrained in his divine and eternal spirit. He, in fact, has "God seed" in him and no matter how the devil tries to corrupt the "image of God (man)" on this earth he cannot touch man's spirit...a spirit that matches the very nature of God. Please realize that risk without the desire to please God is definitely dangerous as you "risk" pleasing the ruler of this world and that's bound to end badly, eventually. It doesn't stop man from acting in faith though...it's the way he was made. Women can learn a lot from men. I just wish we'd get over that curse (the controlling one) that set us back in the garden and made us want to dominate men. It really screws with our ability. I hate the devil, that snake.
I know, I know....I too am tired of "pastor's" (in quotes to include all the different labels they like to paste on themselves these days) telling us who we should be and to "embrace what we know" and "follow Jesus" and using all that vague "spiritual" talk that we are supposed to just understand and if we don't it's because we don't quite love Jesus like we should and then we're back where we started. I'm tired of that. I've heard it my whole life and really, what I've learned about a relationship with Christ is that I find out what to do and where to go by listening to what's inside of me...no one else, just the eternal spirit in me. Some of us take longer than others to quiet the noise around us and to stop caring what other people have to say about us. Some of us are so good at being whoever society tells us to be that we have no idea who we are. You see, when you realize who you are, whether you know Jesus or not, you've heard from HIM. God doesn't just chase the people who know Him...who claim intimate relationship with Him. He is after ALL of us and He flashes our purpose in our lives, in our hearts, in the world around us most every day. He speaks to ALL of us because He WANTS all of us. That's how Love is. You don't have to do anything to find out who you are but pay attention. When you do? When you stop listening to everyone and everything else (it's taken me so long) and you hear what it is you were made for? Run for it....no matter the cost, no matter the sacrifice, no matter the hardship. The dichotomy here is that if the spirit inside of you is not of God it will not define a way to your purpose...instead of seeing direction, you will have to search for it...you will have to listen harder, fail often and keep shoving square pegs in round holes but don't quit. Then?
Here's the danger; If you seek out your purpose and God is not already directing your steps? I mean, if you've never had a salvation experience? If you have not committed your heart and mind and spirit to the being who made it in the first place? You're bound to run smack dab into Him. When you identify who you are? You've identified Christ Himself. You, my friend, are made in the image of God. You have been lied to...we all have but if you seek the Truth you'll find it. Do I still seem to be talking in riddles? Let me give you an example. This blog is about plans and if you've followed my writings to any extent you know that this blog account began with a dream. That dream has, at times, seemed lost or interspersed with struggle and emotion. Here , my friends, if you're paying attention is the miracle of purpose...specifically my purpose:
Last spring, I was online looking for properties...specifically wooded land for sale. I was looking North but I was not looking at any one state or location. At the top of my search, a bed and breakfast property came up for sale. Although it did include land, I was puzzled because there was nothing else for housing listed in my search nor had I any interest in a B&B. I believe I've stayed at one perhaps once in my life. Curiosity got me though and I clicked on the link and noted it was listed for sale several different ways...one of which only included the adjacent land. This solved the mystery and for the evening I was satisfied. The property haunted me though and I found myself going back to the link nearly every day for the week following. I ended up booking a room with the thought that at least I could satisfy the nagging pull inside of me to see what this place's story was.
I arrived at the Victorian homestead in northern Wisconsin with my nine year old son early in the spring. It was unseasonably warm for that time of year and upon our immediate arrival I was actually disappointed. So often in my life, I build up my own expectations and ideals even when I don't know why I'm doing what I'm doing. I had heard nothing and been nowhere at this point but there was something pulling at me telling me to forget the whole notion and go home. I ignored it.
As we were early for check-in, we determined to head into town and see what we could see. I was struck by the friendliness of folks and the "small-town feel". It was way early for tourist season but things were comfortable and slow-paced and everyone seemed happy to see us. Upon returning to the B&B, I was greeted by our host and her first question to me was to ask why I was there. I wasn't sure 'til she asked me and though I wasn't specific, it didn't matter. She knew and I knew why I was there and the rest has become a bit of history that will back the miracle I anticipate.
I believe I have found my new home....our new home. I believe that the self-sustaining community I dream of will happen and I believe it will be established before I leave this earth. This past year I read a book called "The Hiding Place" by Corrie Ten Boom. She did what I want to do. It is not until the end of her book, after the horrors of her story were behind her, where she established a closed community to tend to the wounded and broken...the victims of a society that had survived such atrocities the miracle was nearly drowned in the sorrow. She provided a safe place for them. Our world has not seen such atrocities since but I believe that we will and I believe that I (we) will be ready.
It is a grandiose dream. It has been since I was young and without children. It is not "silly". It is not foolish to ache after what you've been made for. I have found someone to share my dream. I have found friends to help me achieve my dream. He provides the funds nearly daily to facilitate my dream a little bit at a time. I was made for more than motherhood. I was made for more than helping the needy and loving the broken on my little half acre of land with my white house and picket fence. I was made for more than teaching scales and training harmonies and making melodies. I was made for relationship and restoration and hope and love and to show forth the miraculous glory of God who takes a WILLING vessel...one that is broken, unfit for use but still willing to ignore what the world thinks and identify that hole inside of her. That hole in me is where my purpose goes and I am acheiving it. It is not one shape...not one piece that fits...it's like a puzzle inside of me that I've been building my whole life and I keep trying to put the pieces from the other puzzles in it from time to time instead of letting Him fit them in when and as He sees fit. I know what I was made for. I'm paying attention. When I leave this world? People will now I was here and the "print" I leave will look like the glory of God. I'm determined. I get it now. I'll take the risk. "Without faith it is impossible, absolutely impossible to please God"
And it is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him.- Hebrews 11:6
If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it.- Matthew 16:25
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