Family COMMUNion

Think of all the reasons I cannot stand alone The weariness that finds me even when I'm home the guilt of feeling greedy the ache that leaves me needy Never pegged me desperate would never beg and plead  my world, each day more temperate they watch me slowly bleed Everything they tell me never did what doesn't with empty words they quell me and I pray for all that wasn't I paint His name on choices and see His face in voices and wonder If I know Him Wonder where He went I'm pliable and spent I'm used and I am taken Refused and I'm forsaken Phased by weak's critique Beat by pride's attack Retreat as though I'm meek And grasp the knife that's in my back I thought we had a deal This part I wouldn't have to feel This was a temporary stage Forever ago You turned the page. Still stuck in the chapter lost in the verse the "happy ever after" is the part we didn...

I've tried to write this blog 3 times now.  Let's see if I can manage…. Inappropriate Statements/Questions that have been asked of "someone" attempting to facilitate a community that is based on New Testament Teaching: "Let me see a floor plan and I'll think about it." "You need to do this someplace warm.  I don't like the cold." "Who's funding this?" "Will there be internet?" "Hasn't this already been done?" "Bad people will ruin it all." "We're going to worship A LOT?? Won't that get boring??" "I hope we sing the good songs." "Can I leave if I want to?" FIRST OF ALL: NO ONE is doing me a favor by signing up for the community that is STILL in my head. Furthermore, I never asked anyone to sign up but I am allowed to think out loud. I'm not requesting your participation or your funding…I'm simply describing what I believe to ...

Do you know who you are? You're not what they said You're not what you said either Do you know how much we need you? The giftings you posses? The destiny you've been given? Do you get it? Do you know who you are? Do you realize that there's not a single person you know or know of that is a worthless person? You're here because Someone decided You should be

Is there ever a reason to run like your life depends on it? Maybe…if your life does.

Something that is only a feeling Something that leads to healing A pain that tugs me back to where I've been a call to ponder where I was and when The way to remind  I'm not as whole as I thought a hook, a barb that burns each time I'm caught The cause for unexplainable behavior the most likely reason I will waiver The effect of daring to pursue a dream believing things are exactly as they seem And I wrestle with regret…… If there's an explanation it has to be trusting in something less than my Master. I cannot believe that love is ever wasted. I cannot believe that trusting humanity is something I should never do.  I can believe that assuming that anyone can handle my heart but my Savior is a failure that leads to regret. Yet, I find myself believing this very thing…so foolishly, even wistfully , and I always end up in the same place; aching, burning, tossing in the night and hurting in the day and I remind myself why, or maybe H...

Make me a home with your language a haven, a place free of anguish Your far away actions engage me Your chivalrous heart has upstaged me And I'm not afraid and I can't remember the illogical plan or the crazy endeavor I only know the place I'm at now Watching and waiting Wrestling with "how" Ignoring all judgment I know who I am you catch my gaze and turn it to Him And praying for covenant Hoping again and dare to acknowledge the human I am The woman I am when no one else sees Your honesty claims me compels me to please To honor the passion uphold the ambition to honor and cherish and learn sweet submission Pour myself out You pour yourself in And hold me and love me and draw me to Him And making me pray and insisting you'll stay and steadily sweeping my doubts far away A voice unexpected Tender and sweet Laughter that soothes me and fills me with peace Fight through the struggle ...